Many Singles get carried away with the idea of being in love or getting married that they fail to ask their partner or potential spouse some important questions that’ll help reveal more about the person they’re considering sharing the rest of their lives with. In this generation where we can never be too careful or know anyone too much, it is important to ask critical questions before you say “I Do” to be anyone’s spouse.
Below, I share some of these important questions. Some of these questions are to be asked when you’re still contemplating asking the person out or accepting their request for a close relationship. Some are to be asked while you’re dating with courtship in view, and some are to be asked during courtship. The point is, all these questions are best asked and answered satisfactory before you tie the nuptials with that man or woman of your dreams. Doing so will help you make an informed decision about whom to settle down in marriage with.
Kindly note that these questions are in no particular order:
1. Has anyone aborted a child for you?
2. How long do you plan to be in courtship? When do you plan to get married?
3. Do you have any assets or investments?
4. Do you believe children can/should be flogged as a form of discipline?
5. Can inlaws or friends visit us and sleep over within the first year of our marriage?
6. Can family or friends live with us?
7. What’s your opinion on house help and nannies?
8. How do you react when under pressure?
9. When you’re sad or angry, how do you control it? Do you easily bouse back to a happy mood? Do you believe that there are offenses you can never forgive?
10. How do you see my people?
11. What are your views on sex? Are you gay, bisexual or straight? What are your sexual preferences and fantasies?
12. What are your views on work?
What’s your kind of woman – career driven or professional stay at home wife and mum? What’s your take about your woman earning more than you?
13. Have you ever sexually molested anyone or have you been a victim of sexual abuse?
14. Surname change or not?
15. Do you want children? How many children do you want? Do you want to start family immediately after wedding or wait a little bit? What’s your take about having all girls or all boys?
How can you handle delay in your wife getting pregnant especially if your family is mounting pressure on your wife?
16. What do you think should be the responsibilities of the woman in the marriage aside making meals, cleaning and having kids and the responsibilities of the man aside providing financial cover in the home?
Do you think that real men don’t do domestic chores? And real women don’t contribute to the family finances?
17. Where do you see yourselves in ten years time?
18. Faith/religion wise, are you liberal, moderate or hard-line conservative?
19. How do you see your exes? Are they still part of your life? If yes, Why?
20. In the event of difficulties, can you humble yourself and hustle?
21. Do you have any addictions?
22. Is there anything in your past that could show up in the future? Like a child somewhere? Like a cancelled engagement? Like cancelled marriage to someone else in the past?
23. Is the family money our money or everyone keeps theirs?
Do you believe that you have to contribute to the family financially?
24. Do you see your spouse as next of kin?
Beyond what the person says or not, most of the answers you seek will be got through your keen observation and listening beyond what is said.
What other question(s) do you think Singles should ask? Please share with us in the comment.
Love and Wisdom,